Baby steps

When you are kid, everyday you experience something new, a new sensation, a new taste, a new sight, a new smell, a new something that excites you or a new something that exhilarates you. Kids dim-witted they are, would immediately forget all about the new experience that they just had and would go chase a ball or do some stupid thing like that. But I vividly remember some of those experiences and I remember how much it excited me. I tell you even Einstein wouldn't have been so thrilled when he split the atom.

I remember once during a pleasant summer evening I was sitting on my mother's lap on our porch, watching people pass by. She gave me a candy and had one herself. She took the plastic candy wrapper from me and started working on something. I was intently watching her make alternating folds on a candy wrapper, and then twisting it more towards one end. She then made the same alternate folds on another wrapper, tied it around the first wrapper where it's twisted and finally released the folds so they create frills. Voila you have a girl doll wearing a skirt and it was so colorful. I say, seeing a doll made right there out of nothing but two candy wrappers was totally wicked.

One of my cousins had apparently discovered the sensations a peppermint can cause and was all too eager to show it to me. He gave me a peppermint and asked me to have it. I liked the taste of mint and it left a sort of cool feeling in my mouth. All this is was very new to me. He then gave me a glass of water and asked me to drink it. I had a sip and felt as if some iceberg just melted in my mouth and was speeding towards my throat. The cold cold water rushed through my throat and left me all shook up. It was just wonderful and I just kept drinking water till I thought my stomach was going to burst open.

I was playing with an uncle of mine and he wanted to know if I wanted him to draw something for me. Being a stupid kid that I am, I have always thought drawing a ship would be very hard. I mean it's after all a complex piece of machinery, with several decks, tall chimneys, and huge anchors not to mention its enormous size. Ha let me see him draw all that on this small piece of paper? So I asked him to draw me a ship. Once he was done, I couldn't believe that drawing a ship could be this easy. To top it all, he told me he can make me one with nothing but a paper. I went mad with excitement.

Rains

Never felt them to be anything special all my life but all that changed today morning. Not that I danced to glory in the rain with bone chilling winds blowing over my body which our scantily clad bollywood heroines seem to enjoy in one of those item numbers or some such stupid thing but a genuine sense of longing.

We grown ups are so engrossed in making lives complicated for ourselves that we never really take the time to stop and appreciate the small things.

How I wish I would be tightly tucked in the bed with some hot chocolate to relish on. That tepid feeling you get under the comforter. That warm feeling which fills you up from the inside when u take a sip of that hot chocolate. That tingling feeling when your palms engulf the hot chocolate mug with the cold air breezing past your fingers. That soft music created by rain droplets which come crashing down from high above. A book to ponder on or a movie to acquire pleasure from, how I wish I was a kid again! Life was so right then.

How I ended up doing nothing :(

While in India, I wanted to enjoy every moment, talk to my hearts content with family and friends, share a quiet moment with my home, travel on the bus and those share autos, take a long walk, go to the usual grocery store, and do everything just once that reminded me of something special. I didn't have any time to sit down and blog all those wonderful events. The idea was that I would have all the time in the world once I am back. Once I was back, I was home sick, wanted to catch up with friends, reduce my slack in work, and to take it easy for a few weeks. It's been a little more than a month now and I find that the intensity of those feelings has reduced, some incidents totally forgotten, confusion as to where to start and where to end. This is the story of how I wanted to blog some of my most cherished experiences and ended up doing nothing.

Happy Diwali

May the festival of lights,
Fill your life with endless delights,
Good fortunes and good times,
Be plentiful as your year brightens.

Wish you all a very happy Diwali.

Old West German TV Series

Some of my most cherished memories of Doordarshan (DD) from childhood to early teens were those of the West German TV series produced by Transtel and Cologne. I was a great fan of all of them and I still am. These series were usually dubbed in English and were played on DD1 and DD2, long before onslaught of cable and now satellite television. They had a certain charm to them, which captivated me, held me glued to the TV set and finally left me with a feeling of euphoria that lingered on… Yes, I am taking about TV series. I experienced a certain bonding with the characters and overtime it felt as if they were my good friends.

Thanks to Jetix, a rerun of "Didi's comedy show" brought back a flood of all those sweet memories. I vividly remember those animated discussions we had in school about didi's antics, how I used to roll on the floor and laugh at something that Didi did or said and how much my stomach would hurt from all the laughing. This time around at home, I was watching the same with father. Jetix had the show dubbed in Tamil which if anything made it even more hilarious not in an oddball kind of way, but in exactly the same way as a good comedian would perform. The best part of it all was watching it with father. It's sometimes astonishing to see how grown up adults, myself and father, could laugh our hearts out at a TV show.

Derrick was another series that I was really crazy about. It was set in Munich where two police detectives, Stephan Derrick and Harry Klein, would systematically solve murder cases by the sole power of their reasoning alone. Stephan Derrick played by Horst Tappert had a commanding screen presence and I still remember how calm and composed he was through out the entire series, how he would cross-examine and probe inconsistencies and finally how he would break the accused down, that in most cases they usually end up confessing to the crime. Later years when I had the opportunity to watch more such investigative TV series or movies, what struck me most was unlike others, Derrick didn't have any violence involved, no knives, no guns, and no blood, just Derrick's pure brilliance.

Der Fahnder or The Investigator as its called in its English version was another favorite of mine. Faber played by Klaus Wennemann plays the lead role in the series. This was another police investigative series that is fast paced, exciting, intense, riveting, exhilarating and what not. Faber is young, dynamic, impatient police detective always on the look out for action. Well yea, as a kid I sort of wanted to be like him. It's not just the action that made it appealing to me but Faber's brilliant investigative methods, his personality, the friendly nature of the other characters and a sort of attachment you feel with Faber and his family. The title music was one of the best I have heard for any TV series so far. Derrick and Der Fahnder both were sixty minute episodes with a murder, investigation and a conclusion.

Telematch contains a series of games that were played between two little German towns. I loved the series since they always came up with very interesting games to play. I also remember I generally had no penchant towards any of the teams. I would usually support the one that's having the highest points on the board and hence my support would vary several times during a single match.

I grew with these series and thinking about them engulfs me with a feeling of nostalgia. How I wish I could be a kid again. The feeling of watching one of these series while being papered by mom, well what can I say, is just priceless.

PS: I just googled for Klaus Wennemann and found that he left us on 7^th January 2000. He will be sorely missed.

Atrocious teachers’ talk

Some of the unforgettable memories that I have in my life are those of high school, made even more memorable by a few of my lovely teachers. The first thing that comes to my mind when I think about them is the way they talk in the class, with their comical pronunciation, made up grammar, bizarre rhymes all of which discordantly come together to make up what I call the atrocious teachers' talk. I was never able to completely master this talk as a result of which many a times, I have found myself absolutely dazed and confused.

Listed below are few of those hilarious moments, few of which happened to me, a few to my friends.

1. We had an amazing French teacher who was from Karaikal, formerly a French colony. His teachers' talk was so atrocious that we decided it's in our best interest if he speaks French all the time.

"French teacher: See outside. Sun very very hawt. If you talk I kneel down"

2. The geography teacher of my friend feels it's such a herculean task to remember the names of everyone in the class, so he remembers only a few. Wonder how he calls out others in the class?

"Geography teacher: Ramarathnam bai, back bench bai, diagonally across bai, stand up da.
Wrong boy: Me saar.
Geography teacher: No you worthless donkey, the other diagonal bai. "

3. Announcement made by our class teacher to bring our parents to the PTA meeting.

"Class teacher: Bring all your mummies and daddies to the PTA meeting tomorrow. "

4. My science teacher takes pride in talking in rhymes. Most of them were amusing but I could only recollect this one.

"Science teacher (spoken as if he was holding his breath and in a rhyming tone):
If you don't bring your notes on Monday,
I will break your mandai. "

5. This happened to my friend SR when his physics teacher was quizzing the class.

"Physics teacher: SR, what is the SI unit of pressure?
SR: Err… Pascal.
Physics teacher (in a barking voice): SR! Why did you call me rascal? "

6. Most students do not prefer to come to school on a sports day unless they are participating in some event. Invariably this makes our PT teacher mad. He barges into every class and the first thing he howls is

"PT teacher: All of you who are absent stand up."

7. "Math teacher (barking voice): Stannnd up mann. Yyyy are u laughing. Wooopen urr mouth and give me an answer u bloody beggar. Waaaat are u having in ur mouth. Wooopen ur damn mouth u bloody beggar.
Class mate (tries to open his mouth): Saaa…
Math teacher (barking voice): Shhut ur mouth u bloody beggar! Did I ask you to woopen ur mouth. Wooopen ur mouth wen I ask u toooo. Tell me you bloody beggar, yyyy arr u laughing in the class… (Goes on and on…)"

This goes on for a few rounds, at the end of which who ever it is at the receiving end would have undergone some serious psychological damage.

Tag – Random Facts

This has been due for quite sometime now. I was tagged by Ok.

Here are the rules.

1. Players start with 8 random facts about themselves.
2. Those who are tagged should post these rules and their 8 random facts.
3. Players should tag 8 other people and notify them they have been tagged.

Here I go.

1. I have always wanted to skydive, bungee jump and BASE jump at least once.
But there is always this fear that the parachute won't open up, the chord will snap and I will have a dozen lawsuits against me for illegal BASE jumping. I guess I will garner enough courage to do them someday.

2. I love my sleep.
I have been called 'sleeping beauty', 'bear in hibernation', 'sleepy head' and a whole bunch of others. I can sleep for twenty hours straight with all lights turned on, the music system blaring heavy metal and/or the room temperature being a 110 degrees Fahrenheit and still have no trouble falling asleep an hour later. In my dreams, I have made up entire movies and even dreamt of blogging about one of the characters in it. I also carry a notorious reputation of falling asleep in every class while sitting in the front row. (It's not my fault; it's the professor's fault)

3. I cannot hide my emotions.
Be it playful, funny, caring, loving, serious or angry. I have gotten myself into a fair share of trouble with the angry ones. More often with close friends as I take the liberty to express my raw emotions which at times doesn't down all too well.

4. Sometimes I tend to do things even number of times.
Things like closing the door, checking the lock, zipping the bag and so on. A few of my friends think I have obsessive compulsive disorder but frankly I think it's not that serious.

5. I've never had a drink.
I might try it once just for the heck of it but I don't see myself becoming a social drinker. Within the civilized world this is considered something abnormal. I am uncivilized.

6. I notice how people walk.
I know it's weird. But the first thing I notice about people is how they walk. It's my way of remembering them.

7. I like to cook.
I do. After being away from home for a long time, I have learnt to appreciate well cooked home food and relish those rare moments when I do have one.

8. I adore kids.
I am usually good with them too. I could play with them all day and still not be bored or tired one bit. But most of all, for the happiness it brings and the bliss of forgetting the world around.

I have to break rule 3 by tagging only two bloggers,
Divine Ravana.
Ju.

The gift

The room was small. It had among several other things, an even smaller wooden window, pictures and statues of Gods and Goddesses and a shelf high above. Even as an inquisitive child, none of these apparently stirred his curiosity. What really evoked his interest was something on that shelf high above. No one really wondered what it was doing there, gave it a thought or displayed any sort of interest in it and was therefore completely oblivious to its very existence but not him.

The gently flattened bronze globe had a circular pattern of minute exquisite flower carvings, a tiny brass knob consisting of a thin rod attached to a flat circular plate extends right above the globe, screwed on top of the globe itself is a dark green glass shade shaped like a vase. It was breathtakingly beautiful. What more, it was in perfect working condition.

Noticing her grandson's curious little eyes gazing at that something, she gently picks it up. Her eyes twinkled and her lips broke into a soft smile as she quietly looked at it. Her mind was instantly flooded with old memories. Probably it remanded her of a friend and all the playful times they shared; maybe her mom presented it for that special occasion or her husband bought and gifted it during one of their rare vacations. Whatever it was, that something was special, special enough to bring a tear of joy.

Longingly he looks at that something hoping his grandmother would let him have it. She didn't have the heart to refuse. It was special but her grandson was even more. She slowly places it in his tiny hands and wraps her delicate fingers about his. The old miniature green lamp was her gift to him.

Lost and never found

How on earth could I lose you? I keep wondering every now and then. The answer seems to elude me no matter how hard I try. I tried, trust me I really did. I asked old friends, hunted you online, searched your number, even felt I came close but then I was just chasing a mirage.

How exactly we became the best of friends I don't know. Guess we were too young to even realize it then. All my early school memories are filled with you in it, the laughs, the fights, the tears, the fun and those quiet moments. They are still fresh in my mind. The time when I was sick at home the teacher said you refused to have lunch without me. You would complain to my mother that I run away every time you ask me to dance with you. In the class, girls sat in one group, boys in another but you would always boldly sit beside me. Fiercely you defended me when others complained. I could vividly recollect it all, every single one of them.

And then one day, just like that, you were gone. I frantically searched the entire school for you, demanded the teacher that you be returned, cried, fell sick, yet you never came. After all these years, I don't know if you still remember me, I don't know if you still think about me. Just so that you know, I still do.

Sweet sacrifice

A quick look around the house and you come to the conclusion that it’s crying for care and attention. Rough walls, cracks along the seams, hidden termite colonies, bare minimal modern conveniences, ancient furnishing, and incomplete repairs to mention a few in case you haven’t noticed. A little flamboyance could do no harm. It’s a home for God’s sake.

What to you are little and indispensable conveniences in life were a luxury to him. Much more importantly, they were a dent in his savings for his children. Being a perfectionist, he would only purchase products that are of exceptional quality. Exceptional quality comes at a pricey price tag. He takes a long look at one of those fancy automatic washing machines. The store attendant quips, the best money can buy in its category, Sir. You need to do much more to capture his attention. Quick price check; this is my child’s educational expense for a whole year, he thinks. He walks out of the store, no further thinking was required.

Happiness comes in a variety of forms. To him, it was putting a smile on his child’s face, forever. For him, it was worn out sandals, shirts with missing buttons and old trousers that hardly match. For his children, it was designer wear, sporty shoes both formal and informal, cell phones; add to this their lavish spending on movies, parties, dinners, gifts and what not. Never once did he complain, weaken, relent, rest or quit. Sweet sacrifice is what he would term it.

Appa, you are the best.

Coffee with Hide and Seek

Wake up, get ready, skip breakfast, and drag your feet to the class, repetitive tasks done during the course of another mundane day. Trying to listen to all the boring and flawed lectures is more painful than watching one of those never ending soaps on television. They never seem to know what they do and they do this everyday for the next four years. Ha! Who said soaps are miserable. They said join the college, a temple of knowledge, a powerhouse of invention and innovation, an opportunity to make a difference, be an engineer and build a better tomorrow, they said…

Respite at last, sure seemed like a reprieve from death sentence, its just lunch break. Which one to choose? A long sweaty trek in the hot sun to the vegan mess hall where they pride themselves in serving steaming hot food often with a side of bugs or a ride in the auto rickshaw to the air conditioned china town and a movie later on with friends. Hell or heaven? Heaven it is!

Evenings are by default spent at the school cafeteria. Good food. Wonder why the cafeteria guys can’t run our vegan mess too? Two huge tables are immediately occupied, a ruckus made, pairs cuddled together, rest aimlessly look around, the same poor soul orders food every time only to be devoured by everyone else. Lame repetitive discussions about love and friendship, jokes that are irksome and clichéd, agreements and disagreements, groups within a group, veiled hate and jealousy, friends is what they call themselves. It was not always like this. Well times change, so do people. Running away suddenly seemed like an attractive choice to make and it was.

Back to the room, there he was, filled with enthusiasm and energy, just when you are about to give up. Never had to ask him. He reads minds. Enzo? Search the cupboards, waste paper basket, clothes basket, under, over and inside the desk and the bed, beg or borrow, find just enough change to get two coffees and a pack of Parle hide and seek. Laid back, sipping the piping hot coffee, a bite of hide and seek, watching the sun set, the rattling sound of trains passing by, an invigorating talk about God, Yana Gupta in that sizzling song and operating systems design. Life was totally worth it and all it took was him and a coffee with hide and seek. Ah! Sure miss those times.

How much of a life changing experience is it?

I've heard people often say they have had a life changing experience. An experience so profound that it redefines your very definition of life itself. An experience they say, that makes you realize:

How much more there is to live for.
How much less you’ve accomplished in life.
How much people you hardly knew cared for you.
How much more people you intimately knew cared for you.
How much less you should’ve cared about worthless things.

How much more you should’ve cared about the worthwhile ones.

How much you miss some people.
How much you were missed.
How much less some people think about you.
How much less you think about them.
How much things could have gone wrong.
How much things have gone right.
How much less time you got in this world.
How much of it you wasted doing nothing.

How much you wished you had done the things that you've always wanted to,

With those few special loved ones that you've always wanted to be with.

How much you wish you haven’t done the things that you have,
To the ones who didn’t matter.
How much close you brought your own destruction,
Much less others, by your own stupidity.
How much closure making peace with your dear ones can bring,
More so with yourself.
How much you wished you never had to experience this.
How much you wish you had realized it all without one.

I too have had such an experience and those were 24 lines of my realization.

Let the games begin… once again.

My first attempt at blogging was an absolute failure with me posting just one entry and about two people being forced to read it. Purely out of laziness or probably because it was a technical blog, I never bothered to check it ever again. That was three years ago.

It later struck me that if it weren’t for the bloggers of the past, we would have never known about Leonidas or his battle at Thermopylae. History is as good as the person who writes it. I personally consider that most history is skewed apart from the ones that inspire me. I hope to do my part in skewing history with "molōN labeY". In case I haven't then rest assured, you can be sure that I have gone back to my lazy old routine. Now, let the games begin… once again.